You are currently browsing the monthly archive for August 2007.


OneLastCigarette: did you listen to that 50 song
JCP001: not yet
OneLastCigarette: ok
OneLastCigarette: lets review it
JCP001: is it bad ass or funny?
OneLastCigarette: listen to it
JCP001: he gits it
OneLastCigarette: i gitit!
OneLastCigarette: theres a remix with ludacris, but its not as good
JCP001: 50 cracks me up
OneLastCigarette: hes a comedian
OneLastCigarette: i took quarter water, sold it in bottles for two bucks
JCP001: i hate seeing him perform on shows. he sucks. zero stage presence for a rapper
OneLastCigarette: yeah. i never put too many expec into rap shows though
JCP001: dude, it’s a case quarter water
OneLastCigarette: spank rock was sick a couple weeks ago though
OneLastCigarette: you got a case quarter, son?
OneLastCigarette: 50 said if kanye sells more than him the fist week he’ll never make a solo record again
JCP001: same for kanye?
OneLastCigarette: nah
OneLastCigarette: shits drop 9/11
JCP001: son
OneLastCigarette: i think when he says “”do not fuck with the kid, i get biz with the cig, i can really live, you dig?” he means he will fucking shoot you
JCP001: what?
OneLastCigarette: lyrics
JCP001: ah ok
JCP001: i’m just pissed that i’m gonna hear this blasting from cars until it gets too cold to keep your windows open
OneLastCigarette: i hear this shit all day long out of cars in bk
JCP001: actually, it’ll beat the reggae-ton
OneLastCigarette: apparently albanian kids with unibrows run new york
JCP001: i’m having flashbacks to high school
OneLastCigarette: say whatever you want about this dude and his shitty sophomore lp, this song is fucking dope
OneLastCigarette: what do you give this 50 single
OneLastCigarette: it has a video
JCP001: awesome
OneLastCigarette: i havent seen it. is it?
JCP001: everything’s green in it cuz he gits money
JCP001: he’s so emotionless
OneLastCigarette: hes a coldhearted gangsta
JCP001: i give it a 3, cuz kanye’s gonna be the man
JCP001: but 50 got black chicks with blonde hair in this video.
OneLastCigarette: i dont know. ive heard 3 songs from graduation and the only one i liked at all is stronger. yeah, the one with the daft punk sample…
OneLastCigarette: i give this a 4. this is a legitimate summer banger
OneLastCigarette: im entirely into this song
OneLastCigarette: i listen to it on repeat
JCP001: while you’re getting ready to go out? does it get you psyched?
OneLastCigarette: i put it on when i smoke weed
OneLastCigarette: makes me feel like a hard ass thug, son
JCP001: walk a mile in my shoes
JCP001:3stars.jpg OneLastCigarette:4stars.jpg



OneLastCigarette: just woke up
JCP001: nice
JCP001: i thought about napping. got real close
OneLastCigarette: cant watch that here
OneLastCigarette: has to be at work
OneLastCigarette: what is it
JCP001: funny
OneLastCigarette: have you seen chocolate rain?
OneLastCigarette: youtube chocolate rain
JCP001: wait–what??
OneLastCigarette: chocolate rain
OneLastCigarette: just do it and dont ask ?s
JCP001: that dude??
OneLastCigarette: tay zonday
OneLastCigarette: you wanna do this review while i listen to it
JCP001: i’m watching jimmy kimmel and that guy talks like that. weird
OneLastCigarette: thats fucking scary
OneLastCigarette: hes on it right now?
JCP001: no, no, you high bastard
OneLastCigarette: then when are we gonna do it
JCP001: yor internets. they are feeble
OneLastCigarette: your mothers cock sucking abilities are not feeble
JCP001: c’mon. don’t go down mom street
JCP001: how many songs of this record do you still have to listen to
OneLastCigarette: 1
OneLastCigarette: i have it on now
OneLastCigarette: and im not gonna listen to it again
JCP001: hate it huh?
OneLastCigarette: this record is weak like a polio kid flippin’ through a wheelchair catalog
JCP001: that was nice. did you use that recently or are you just flowin’?
OneLastCigarette: it just came out of me
OneLastCigarette: brand new
JCP001: fresh out the oven
JCP001: i’m the only one who’s down then
JCP001: dennis hated it
OneLastCigarette: its so boring
OneLastCigarette: you gonna give it a five, fag?
JCP001: i actually thought it was pretty interesting and surprisingly catchy. the vocals are dull though.
OneLastCigarette: whatever
OneLastCigarette: im halfway into the song knights
JCP001: that’s a banga
OneLastCigarette: this thing is a total fucking snooze though
OneLastCigarette: itunes user ratings mean dick
OneLastCigarette: squat
JCP001: who said anything about itunes?
OneLastCigarette: i just did
OneLastCigarette: their user ratings are high for these guys
OneLastCigarette: but they probably have high user ratings for korn on there too
JCP001: all the people who review on their are either 16 yos or aspiring critics who write a fucking thesis on the things
OneLastCigarette: aspiring deeeks
JCP001: 3rd lp . they got indie clout
OneLastCigarette: track 5 isnt that boring
JCP001: dr. L’ling is 2 minutes too long
OneLastCigarette: then nevermind
OneLastCigarette: i wasnt up to the metal guitars
OneLastCigarette: neeer neeeeiir
JCP001: the musicianship is solid. i hate those trippy, jam out bridge bits though
OneLastCigarette: waaaahwaaaah
JCP001: that was your guitar imitation?
OneLastCigarette: yes
JCP001: midtempo not your speed?
OneLastCigarette: this record is not good
OneLastCigarette: bad recs are not my speed
JCP001: they did manage to get a nice shot of hoth for the album cover though.
OneLastCigarette: im glad youre providing this additional info
OneLastCigarette: so i dont have to look
OneLastCigarette: hey didnt we decide you the editor for a reason
OneLastCigarette: namely so that i would never have to edit these
OneLastCigarette: what happened to that
JCP001: what do you rate? 1?
OneLastCigarette: no i was a little harsh
OneLastCigarette: 2
JCP001: this record is good for when i’m stoned and working at night
OneLastCigarette: so it’ll be in your top 25 most played this year
JCP001: i was gonna drop my top 12.5 of the year so far soon. watch for it
JCP001: 4stars.jpg OneLastCigarette: 2stars.jpg


OneLastCigarette: if you think im listening to this more than once youre fucking nuts
OneLastCigarette: so today at the show paul bruno asked “have people been sending in their records?”
OneLastCigarette: and im like no were dicks, we didnt get that set up yet
JCP001: and you said…?
OneLastCigarette: thats what i said
JCP001: sorry
JCP001: started typing before i saw your response
JCP001: survivorman was drinking his own pee. got distacted. new season
OneLastCigarette: its good to be back
OneLastCigarette: who would be better on that show chuck norris or jack bauer
JCP001: bauer. survivorman would have a hard time keeping up
OneLastCigarette: track 6 – kiss. i didnt think this record would hit a new horrible low mid-way
OneLastCigarette: oh and KORN UNTITLED
OneLastCigarette: broadcast live from my one and only listen
JCP001: we’re actually doing this? I listened to half of the record and realized that there was a reason why i never listened to korn in the first place.
JCP001: i figured we could do spoon and put the shit storm of korn behind us
OneLastCigarette: yeah i wanna be a hack asshole, lets do spoon.
OneLastCigarette: can we move along
JCP001: but i do want to mention head just so we could link to him
JCP001: thank you
OneLastCigarette: google: head jesus korn
OneLastCigarette: im not doing spoon
OneLastCigarette: i was being sarcastic
OneLastCigarette: stop resisting
OneLastCigarette: what kind of welcome back is this
JCP001: just listening to korn is embarrassing. I’ll have to play it on my head phones
JCP001: when i listened to the first few songs on the train i felt like people knew i was listening to korn. might have been the look of disgust on my face
OneLastCigarette: so we have nothing. cause i dont even know what to say about this atrocity
OneLastCigarette: you always look like that
JCP001: since i like to read the fan reviews on iTunes, apparently they “changed their sound”
OneLastCigarette: track 8 – ever be. blatant led zeppelin rip off
JCP001: still sounds like nu-metal. and they all still look like coolio except the drummer.
OneLastCigarette: saw ted leo and the thermals today
OneLastCigarette: the thermals were really fuckin good
OneLastCigarette: surprised me
OneLastCigarette: ted leo did that whole ted leo thing again
JCP001: something about the thermals irks me
JCP001: that’s what you get for hanging with music jerks
OneLastCigarette: the night after i hurled at martini when i woke up in my bed i didnt know where i was
OneLastCigarette: little “cross promotion” there
OneLastCigarette: whoever saw me puking, this is for you
OneLastCigarette: or saw me layed out on terrence’s trunk
OneLastCigarette: who ironically left his car there because he was too wasted
JCP001: sounds like a hoot, you gross bastard
OneLastCigarette: no i was actually very elegant about it
OneLastCigarette: nobody actually saw me vom
OneLastCigarette: so any stand out terribleness in this album?
OneLastCigarette: ill call tracks 1-13 as the most terrible songs on the album in no particular order
JCP001: the lyrics are awful
JCP001: he’s writing angst ridden songs for teenagers in big stupid pants. they still exist. i’ve seen them
OneLastCigarette: you lie
JCP001: on the streets like they teleported from 1998
JCP001: with white guy braids
OneLastCigarette: the beard braid
OneLastCigarette: with a bead
JCP001: so wait, their last record flopped?
OneLastCigarette: this invokes rammstein and coal chamber and all other sorts of terrible
OneLastCigarette: do you know what its called?
OneLastCigarette: cause i dont
OneLastCigarette: when that guy head finds jesus theres no way he’ll forgive him for all the terrible records hes already made
JCP001: nope. unforgivable. and i’m so disinterested I’m not even going to research it
JCP001: korn. bad call
OneLastCigarette: your idea, for the record
JCP001: i was hoping you wouldn’t point that out, dick, but i also knew you would because you’re a dick.
OneLastCigarette: well im not exactly overflowing with material here. give me a break
OneLastCigarette: im really scraping the barrell
JCP001: i’ve still been working over that spoon record
OneLastCigarette: i chewed all the flavor out of it to be honest
JCP001: then i started working through old spoon.
JCP001: they pretty much have a flawless catalog
OneLastCigarette: it was argued by aforementioned music jerks that they were the most consistent band of the 00’s
OneLastCigarette: or the past few years
OneLastCigarette: or some shit
OneLastCigarette: along with the white stripes
OneLastCigarette: i was really high i dont remember any more
JCP001: was there a vote taken before they kicked the disagreeing music geek off nerd island?
OneLastCigarette: korn. what a horrible album
JCP001: so horrible they couldn’t even title the piece of shit.
OneLastCigarette: im putting on spoon
OneLastCigarette: i think ill get some chicken broccoli for dinner
JCP001: zero all around.
OneLastCigarette: i give this one empty look of disgust
JCP001:0star.jpg OneLastCigarette:0star.jpg